3 Whys, Ladies
Shirl's tagged me with these 3 questions. I've done the answers; new questions and tags to follow later...
1. WHY does a finger nail feel enormous when you rub it with the end of the thumb on the same hand? And, by the same token, why does a tooth feel like a tombstone when you rub it with the tip of your tongue?
If you're only using the nerves on the end of your thumb, then it stands to reason that a fingernail feels larger than when you look at it. Your eyes understand perspective. Your thumb doesn't. To your thumb, EVERYthing is giant.
2. WHY does a night's sleep lasting 7 hours with at least one hour slept before midnight do you more good than a night's sleep lasting 8 or more hours all started after midnight?
Because after midnight the toys come to life. So do the goblins who live in the curtain hems, and the penguins who live in the water tank (they emigrated there to avoid the walruses in Alaska). They turn up their little goblin radios, and dance all over the house. They open the fridge door and spin in the washing machine, they sprinkle dew on the garden and breathe heavily on the window panes. The miniature soldiers climb in and play tennis with your tonsils. The goblins play trampoline on your body as you sleep. And you wake up feeling as though your tongue has carpet fur on it, and all your muscles have been pummelled by tiny feet (not in a good way).
3. WHY do I find nasty little crumbs and other unwanted debris behind items standing on the kitchen counter whenever I clean even though we always wipe the surfaces before and after we prepare food?
See above.
1. WHY does a finger nail feel enormous when you rub it with the end of the thumb on the same hand? And, by the same token, why does a tooth feel like a tombstone when you rub it with the tip of your tongue?
If you're only using the nerves on the end of your thumb, then it stands to reason that a fingernail feels larger than when you look at it. Your eyes understand perspective. Your thumb doesn't. To your thumb, EVERYthing is giant.
2. WHY does a night's sleep lasting 7 hours with at least one hour slept before midnight do you more good than a night's sleep lasting 8 or more hours all started after midnight?
Because after midnight the toys come to life. So do the goblins who live in the curtain hems, and the penguins who live in the water tank (they emigrated there to avoid the walruses in Alaska). They turn up their little goblin radios, and dance all over the house. They open the fridge door and spin in the washing machine, they sprinkle dew on the garden and breathe heavily on the window panes. The miniature soldiers climb in and play tennis with your tonsils. The goblins play trampoline on your body as you sleep. And you wake up feeling as though your tongue has carpet fur on it, and all your muscles have been pummelled by tiny feet (not in a good way).
3. WHY do I find nasty little crumbs and other unwanted debris behind items standing on the kitchen counter whenever I clean even though we always wipe the surfaces before and after we prepare food?
See above.
posted by Anna @ 3:02 AM
2 Comments:
At 1:21 PM,
Anonymous said…
Thank you Anna for giving me your answers to the things that keep me awake at night - or would do if I let them and if I weren't so busy trying to photograph my toys coming to life.
It's Terry Ted I blame most. He's been with me all my life and is threadbare in a well-worn and knows it way (like Des Lynam). He entices all the other toys to do the most bizarre things. I keep one eye open and the other one does all the sleeping for me. No wonder I have headaches most mornings.
What's worse, I have a husband who talks in his sleep. About anything and everything, perfectly lucidly. But can I recall what he said in the morning...
At 1:58 AM,
Anna said…
Ah, I'm a sleep-talker, too. Busy brains, you see! It's got 24 hours worth of (semi) intelligent thoughts to get rid of, after all. And this Ted sounds like trouble. Maybe you should lock him in the washing machine tonight and get a good night's sleep for a change.
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