Censored

All I seem to be talking about right now is wee and poo: to our new neighbours, husband, kitchen sales rep, editors and clients. This must be what it's like when you're a new mother and totally absorbed by your arrival's toilet and eating habits. But then it would be worse, obviously. At least I don't actually get weed on. (Steve did, but it was his own fault.)

I am even considering some kind of eating/sleeping/pooing wall chart, to enable me to better predict when she needs to go out and when I should be ready with the Dettol. There must be some sort of pattern, or do puppies prefer to keep us on our toes?

And does anybody know why puppies eat poo? I would like to read some scientific research on the matter. Forget the Christmas retail boom and Celebrity Big Brother, I want to read more about poos and wees.

It doesn't even seem to matter whose poo it is.

I don't think our new neighbours must have a very high opinion of me just yet.

Although that implies that one day they might, which is probably hopeful.