Good with words

Fear... distractions.... the efforts of a self-employed writer to pay the mortgage.... all that jazz.

Thursday, June 15, 2006


Okay, but seriously, what's the deal? You move into a village in the middle of nowhere and everyone takes an instant dislike to the very sight of you? They scuttle away down lanes when you're coming, and cross over with their zimmers to avoid passing you?

I bet they meet in the community hall and discuss the new folks, and work out strategies for ridding the village of home-working no-children yuppies.

So I went to the Post Office to collect another parcel today. (Yes, I got another red card through the door. But if Posty insists on coming at odd hours, what does she expect? There, another person who hates me.)

I asked our neighbour Lucy if she'd ever seen dogs in the PO and she said yes, hundreds. I had seen one in there too, so I figured it was safe to take Holly. (Good to get her used to these things, and plus she can protect me from the butcher boys on the way to the PO.)

When we got there the Post Office lady peered down over the counter disapprovingly. I was surprised. "Is it okay to bring her in?" I asked.

"Not really," she shook her head, and held out her hand for my red card.

I quickly got my parcel and stamps, and right then, another lady walked in. WITH A LABRADOR.

Does Post Office lady look disapprovingly at her dog and roll her eyes? Nope.

Does Post Office lady smile warmly and greet the newcomer, as is appropriate for a village Post Office clerk to behave towards customers? Yep.


So I let Holly have a little sniff-and-greet, and after a minute the lab started looking a bit edgy. Holly was her usual lively self and most dogs get tired of her pretty soon, to be fair.

"I think he's had enough now," called Post Office Lady from behind the counter.


Holly and I walked out in disgust.

So do you see what I am up against? HMPH!! and DOUBLE HMPH!!

Steve says I should tell her to sod off next time (but using ruder words). But he has already taken up with one of the men across the road and we are adding to the list of People We Or Our Neighbours Have Fought With. So I am going to continue being nice and hope that my way wins in the end........

Just how long do you have to live in a village, do you think, to become accepted? Answers on a postcard.... oh, no, the posty hates me... best just leave me to rot in my cottage, afraid to step out the front door...


  • At 12:10 AM, Blogger Jon said…

    I agree with Steve. Be very very rude!

  • At 7:08 AM, Blogger Anna said…

    And I thought village life would be friendly! Well, they're not going to break me that easily. I will remain polite no matter what.

    Steve reacts more harshly! He took offence because the man over the road called him "chap" (apparently a term of endearment round here). I think cultures invent their own words deliberately to hound out the foreigners.

    For instance, if our neighbour Mark went to Swansea and someone said "alright butt?" he would probably punch them. It is a strategy, if you ask me, to identify people who Aren't One Of Us.

  • At 2:23 PM, Blogger Sweet Shirleen said…

    Ahhh but have you considered that you aren't hated for being new at all? You could be victim to the DRAGON POST OFFICE woman! I work in a Post Office and believe me one of us has to be a dragon to at least one customer, it's not personal, it's the law!

    On a serious note I hope things get better for you, if not bake up a batch of laxative cookies!


Post a Comment

<< Home